You can't use your parents' bank accounts after they die. You just can't.

As thousands of Canadians are finding out each year, they cannot gain access to their parents' assets after the parents' death just because the parent allowed them access while they were alive. Parents need to make wills putting someone in charge and allowing someone access. A reader recently wrote to me sounding somewhat put out because the bank would not let her continue to pay bills after her mother died. Read on to see her note and my comments.

"My mother died without a will. There is no estate to speak of, just the money in her bank account (less than $3,000). I was handling things for her for seven years while she was in a nursing home. I find I am now blocked from using her account. I paid all the bills through her account (she had pension, CPP, and OAS) and now I'm blocked. I paid the final expenses from my own account since it seemed easier. How can I get reimbursed for the expenses from her account?"

Of course you cannot use her account. You are not her. It's not your money to use. People are always extremely surprised to find that places such as banks and land registries won't just let them take their parents' assets. Why would this surprise you? Your parents do not cease to be individuals with legal rights just because they have aged.

The fact that you helped her with her banking for years is great. Obviously she had someone she trusted to lean on when she needed help. However, that does not create any legal right for you to use her money after she has passed away. As you said, there is no will. That means that she has not appointed you as her executor. The bank has no legal authority to allow you access to her money.

If you had not already paid the funeral bill, I would suggest that you give the invoice to the bank and ask them to pay it from your mother's account. This is acceptable at pretty much every bank, assuming there is enough money in the account. However, you've already paid the bill yourself and the bank is not going to give you money directly for the reasons outlined above.

So let's look at the next option.

If the amount of money in the account was large, I would suggest that you or one of your siblings apply to the court to become the administrator of your mother's estate. However, given the size of the account, the cost of obtaining Letters of Administration would eat up the whole account. The banks have a process available for this type of situation.

If the bank account is the only asset your mother owned, the bank will not insist on probate (unless there is a dispute between siblings or something like that). All of you who are entitled to your mother's estate according to intestacy law in your province can sign an indemnity agreement at the bank. This is a form provided by the bank without you paying legal fees for it. It would need the signature of all beneficiaries and all would agree in writing to indemnify the bank from any future claims against the estate.

Because you had been handling your mother's finances for years, you would be a in a good position to determine whether she had any creditors who are likely to come forward, or whether there is an unpaid tax bill, or other financial trap waiting to spring.

Hopefully all of you can agree that the funds in the account would be used to pay final expenses first, and that would allow you to reimburse yourself from her account. If you disagree, there is nobody legally in charge of the estate to make the decision or settle the dispute.

You will have to realize that although this procedure will allow you to reach the short-term goal of reimbursing yourself, it will not give you the legal status of an executor or an administrator. The bank can get you to sign forms that allows you access to the assets over which they have control, but they can't do anything to help you with estate matters outside the bank. You may still have problems dealing with pensions or tax returns or other situations.