Does no reading of the will mean the executor is hiding something?

I am asked this question so often that I wonder where the idea of a reading of the will comes from. Many people tell me that they expect a formal gathering of the entire extended family with the lawyer at the head of the table, reading the will word for word to the assembled crowd. I have only seen a reading of the will in that form in the movies.

A reading of the will in the sense of a family gathering is not something that is usually done. You should not assume that because there is no reading of the will that the executor is hiding something.

If the executor wishes, he or she can arrange for a meeting of the beneficiaries of the will and the lawyer. Sometimes executors want this because they feel that the lawyer will be better able to answer the beneficiaries' questions about particular assets, probate or timelines, particularly if the executor is feeling overwhelmed. It's completely optional though. And you'll notice that I didn't say a "meeting of the family". I said a "meeting of the beneficiaries". They may not be the same people.

As hard as it may be to hear, if you are not a beneficiary of a will, you are not entitled to have a copy of the will or see the will or be told what is in it. Many a pointless estate fight has been fought over this point, simply because an individual can't or won't accept that he's not entitled to know what's in a will. This is especially true when the deceased person is a parent.

Having said that, I'm well aware that not all executors are as trustworthy or as honest as the deceased had hoped they'd be. If I felt that the executor of an estate in my family was lying to me or stealing assets, you'd better believe that I'd push the point about seeing the will. I'd be prepared to accept the estate lawyer's written assurance that I'm not named in the will. (And for those of you who are quite sure that a lawyer would lie in these circumstances, ask yourself why on earth a lawyer would be prepared to be disbarred over your mom or dad's estate).

If you're an executor wondering whether you should hold a reading of the will, consider it as one more tool in your executor's toolkit, and use it if you think it will help matters along.